Have you ever feel disconected?
Have you ever ask anyone around you about the reason why we were sent down to Earth?
Or...have you ever feel disgusted with your own body?
That's how I feel right now.
Sometimes when I'm all alone, I think about why I stay in this body. Trapped in a cage made from flesh and blood. A cage we call 'human'.
Sometimes I wonder what kind of thing I am before I was born. I mean, what am I before I enter this cage? Am I a 'thing' called 'spirit'? Or am I something else? Who did tuck me to this body?
To my surprise, I found myself mumbling, "What if I actually did not ever want to live on Earth inside this 'cage'?"
Life is a bunch of mysteries we never solved completely. Ever since the day the cavemen found firebond to the hi-tech century era we are living in right now, we are still fall astonished when foundings are extracted from the simplest, the most slip-of-our-mind things in the world. Who would guess that catching a school bus in the morning or having a family dinner are actually a reflection of how socially constructed we are. Who would discover that a slight move of a butterfly's wings in America can cause a tsunami in Japan (according to Chaos Theory). Thus, from all the discoveries, inventions, and inovations we (hopefully) come to the point where we start to examine ourselves.
One thing that makes me glee is the fact of how earthbounded we are. Human, or I should call so in 'human' language, have been ruling the Earth for an uncountable time (and yet, time is uncountable actually. We use numbers to make it easy to predict). However, they are still confused about their identities. Okay, it is easy for them to notice each other by their nationalities, language, and stuffs. But, these kind of notion are just 'weak' for they only judge from the external side, from the 'Earth's Crust'. To judge from the internal side? Hhmm, that's such a heavy load of bull!
Who are we?
As I mentioned before, we are living in a flesh-meat-bone 'walking cage' called 'human'. Now, I'm going to separate the 'cage' from the 'prisoner'.
What do we see now?
We realize that we are something else. 'The prisoner', which is human's other form, is a supernatural being called 'soul' or 'spirit'. No, I did not mention Sadako or Kuntilanak here. I am talking about 'human spirit'.
As a prisoner, the spirit has an intention to escape, right? Have you ever think about 'escaping from your body' for a while because you think that your 'cage' is a load of shit?
I mean, think about porn movies. They give you pleasures, really (pssst, believe it or not, I watch them! Not so often, really. Am I crazy for watching American Pie everyday? Boy, got lotta stuffs to be done!). But think about it, do you sometimes feel disgusted by the scene? Like, you think "Holy Lord, this is just a waste of juice! Look at the way she moans? That's sucks. How on Earth can we do something so disgusting just to defend our species?"
Indeed, our body is just an organic machine. Digestive 'system', respiration 'system', secression 'system', reproduction 'system', all these things have the word 'system' behind them, which is a term to say something mechanic. We learn about this in our Biology class, and in the mean time those who take Medical School should deal with the machine's parts. Just like a mechanic fixing a car.
I can't believe that we, human, are just like a massive factory producing millions of new 'imprisoned spirit' every seconds.
On the other hand, I wonder what would happen if we never live inside this 'cage'. Are we still 'human'? Do we get our identity such as 'humanity'? Or 'spirinity', hehehe :D. If that happen, where do we live? Beneath the sky? Wandering around the dimensions? Or do we still get stuck inside Earth's atmosphere?
(Damn, it's half past nine! Gotta go to bed)
Well, life is a mystery we try to peel off.